Reflections: 10 years

Yesterday Amy and I were married ten years ago in Centerville, OH at Franklin St Baptist church. The ten years together have wonderful. To celebrate we took this weekend away from the kids. We have ended up in a fun hotel in Florence, KY called the Wildwood Inn and Suites which is home to theme suites and a safari village. The best thing about the weekend is simply being together.

My first reflection on our ten years of marriage is that we are so blessed because we still simply enjoy spending time together. We don’t need anything crazy to keep us entertained or to keep us engaged but by doing whatever we are doing together makes it worth it. For instance last night we were in the hotel room and just enjoyed watching a couple episodes of Lost together. Prior to that we spent some time walking around a mall in Florence. No those things in themselves are not special but doing it with Amy makes it special. For Amy and I this has been nothing new. When we first started dating one of our favorite things to do was to go Perkins and get coffee. Clearly I was settling for less than the best coffee. While there we would spend time in conversation while we colored together. When we would finish our pictures we would always write a love note to each other. I am so grateful that after ten years we simply enjoy being together, wherever that may be.

Sanctifying would be the second thought of reflection. Marriage to Amy has been used by God to draw us both closer to Him as we learn to love one another. Over the years the depth of my sinfulness has been exposed. From my selfishness, to my fear, to my laziness, etc. I could go on but then this could get depressing. In all of it Amy has always chosen by the grace of God to forgive. Never once has she ever held anything over my head or been critical towards me as a result of my sin. This has been a true picture of the grace of God. Amy has also been such a big supporter, encouraging me to pursue the God and at times putting aside her desires as a result. This has been a picture of God’s sacrifice for us and His desire to see us grow. God has also used Amy to sanctify me with her mouth. She has never been afraid to speak up and tell me when I am acting stupid and following Christ. This is such a blessing although at first it can be a bit painful. I praise the Lord that Amy loves me so much that she is not afraid to speak up.

Amy and I have truly lived as one flesh over the last ten years. When I think back I am amazed at how we have made choices together and patiently waited for one another when we weren’t quite ready to make a decision. I was given a great piece of advice when I got married about the importance of unity when it came to making decisions. The impact of this has been great on our marriage. Whenever something comes up and there is not unity, I am driven to my knees in prayer that God would make whatever adjustments are neccesary in either of us so that we may have unity. Without fail God has answered this request everytime. The truth is neither Amy nor I have been given the blueprint of our lives from God so we are both seeking Him and His will. Either of us can miss what He has for us for different reasons. As we seek unity the Lord refines us and helps us die to those desires that may be guided out of selfishness or something else. Everyday I praise God for a wife who I know is seeking God and that her first priority is to honor Him.

There are many more reflections that I could write about and maybe I will take some time to write more tomorrow. I would like to wrap up with one more. Amy and I are daily in need of God’s grace and presence to have another amazing ten years together. If it were not for the gospel we would not be where we are at. Our marriage has been amazing and will only remain amazing if Amy and I continually look to the gospel. In Esphesians we are called to love our spouses. Wives are to submit to their husbands as to the Lord and Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her. All of this is built on the grace of God being at work in our lives because of our coming to Christ in repentance and faith. I am too sinful to be able to make this marriage work and to work well, but because of Christ at work in me, I am able to love Amy and die to myself in marriage. As we focus on Christ our marriage will only grow stronger but if we take our focus off Him will only be a matter of time before we focus on ourselves and our marriage grows weaker and weaker. So by the grace of God we must cling to Him everyday as individuals and as a couple. He is so good! Thank you Lord!

If I had one prayer for us it would be that Amy and I would walk with God as individuals and as a couple. I pray that as one flesh we would have no greater desire than to know Christ and Him crucified (Philippians 3).

Amy I love you so much and I praise God for you everyday! You are truly my best friend. lover and wife! I simply want to spend my life with you serving our great God and Savior!

PS- Sex is truly one of the great privileges of marriage!!!