Reflections: 10 years

Yesterday Amy and I were married ten years ago in Centerville, OH at Franklin St Baptist church. The ten years together have wonderful. To celebrate we took this weekend away from the kids. We have ended up in a fun hotel in Florence, KY called the Wildwood Inn and Suites which is home to theme suites and a safari village. The best thing about the weekend is simply being together.

My first reflection on our ten years of marriage is that we are so blessed because we still simply enjoy spending time together. We don’t need anything crazy to keep us entertained or to keep us engaged but by doing whatever we are doing together makes it worth it. For instance last night we were in the hotel room and just enjoyed watching a couple episodes of Lost together. Prior to that we spent some time walking around a mall in Florence. No those things in themselves are not special but doing it with Amy makes it special. For Amy and I this has been nothing new. When we first started dating one of our favorite things to do was to go Perkins and get coffee. Clearly I was settling for less than the best coffee. While there we would spend time in conversation while we colored together. When we would finish our pictures we would always write a love note to each other. I am so grateful that after ten years we simply enjoy being together, wherever that may be.

Sanctifying would be the second thought of reflection. Marriage to Amy has been used by God to draw us both closer to Him as we learn to love one another. Over the years the depth of my sinfulness has been exposed. From my selfishness, to my fear, to my laziness, etc. I could go on but then this could get depressing. In all of it Amy has always chosen by the grace of God to forgive. Never once has she ever held anything over my head or been critical towards me as a result of my sin. This has been a true picture of the grace of God. Amy has also been such a big supporter, encouraging me to pursue the God and at times putting aside her desires as a result. This has been a picture of God’s sacrifice for us and His desire to see us grow. God has also used Amy to sanctify me with her mouth. She has never been afraid to speak up and tell me when I am acting stupid and following Christ. This is such a blessing although at first it can be a bit painful. I praise the Lord that Amy loves me so much that she is not afraid to speak up.

Amy and I have truly lived as one flesh over the last ten years. When I think back I am amazed at how we have made choices together and patiently waited for one another when we weren’t quite ready to make a decision. I was given a great piece of advice when I got married about the importance of unity when it came to making decisions. The impact of this has been great on our marriage. Whenever something comes up and there is not unity, I am driven to my knees in prayer that God would make whatever adjustments are neccesary in either of us so that we may have unity. Without fail God has answered this request everytime. The truth is neither Amy nor I have been given the blueprint of our lives from God so we are both seeking Him and His will. Either of us can miss what He has for us for different reasons. As we seek unity the Lord refines us and helps us die to those desires that may be guided out of selfishness or something else. Everyday I praise God for a wife who I know is seeking God and that her first priority is to honor Him.

There are many more reflections that I could write about and maybe I will take some time to write more tomorrow. I would like to wrap up with one more. Amy and I are daily in need of God’s grace and presence to have another amazing ten years together. If it were not for the gospel we would not be where we are at. Our marriage has been amazing and will only remain amazing if Amy and I continually look to the gospel. In Esphesians we are called to love our spouses. Wives are to submit to their husbands as to the Lord and Husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her. All of this is built on the grace of God being at work in our lives because of our coming to Christ in repentance and faith. I am too sinful to be able to make this marriage work and to work well, but because of Christ at work in me, I am able to love Amy and die to myself in marriage. As we focus on Christ our marriage will only grow stronger but if we take our focus off Him will only be a matter of time before we focus on ourselves and our marriage grows weaker and weaker. So by the grace of God we must cling to Him everyday as individuals and as a couple. He is so good! Thank you Lord!

If I had one prayer for us it would be that Amy and I would walk with God as individuals and as a couple. I pray that as one flesh we would have no greater desire than to know Christ and Him crucified (Philippians 3).

Amy I love you so much and I praise God for you everyday! You are truly my best friend. lover and wife! I simply want to spend my life with you serving our great God and Savior!

PS- Sex is truly one of the great privileges of marriage!!!

A Tribute

Over the last four years as I have completed my master’s there is one thing thing other than God that I could not have down without: Amy!  Between working full-time, school and the family if she had not been there we would not have made it through.  Throughout the entire journey with all the ups and downs, mountains and valleys she was a so strong and made so many sacrifices.  For all she has done there is nothing I could do that would be worthy to express how amazing she is.

She is an amazing friend. Amy is my best friend! There is no one I would rather spend my time with than her.  She knows me inside and out, with all my strengths and weaknesses and yet she still wants to be with me and around me.  As a friend she was such and encouragement during those highs and lows of school when I thought I might fail a class as well as when I did great on a test.  She also encouraged me through different jobs I had that at times were tough because I didn’t enjoy them. She would stay up late to spend time with me and always do lots of little things to let me know she was there for me.  I praise God that He has given me such a great best friend!

She is an amazing wife! In the Bible it teaches that the women was given as a helper to the man.  A famous line from a movie is “you complete me!” These two things typify who Amy is as a wife.  Over the last four years and I am sure for the rest of our lives she has been great at keeping things going in our lives, allowing me to be free to focus on school.  From making phone calls, to dealing with people, to keeping our calendars insync, to finding unique ways to make money she did so much to keep us a float.  One winter she addressed and stuffed envelopes so that we could buy people Christmas gifts.  She spent hours doing this, with such determination and doing all of it because of the deep love she has for people. She also sold pampered chef for a little while which also helped keep us a float.  I know especially when we first got to Louisville it was extremely tough but through it all she came out on top, trusting the Lord to get through it all. So much of who Amy is, is a complement to me and vice versa.  Where I am weak she is strong and she often has insight into things that I am missing.  From what I can tell she is an example to all woman of the calling God places on the wife.

She is an amazing mother! We had two kids when we moved to Louisville and the third arrived while we were there. I often find myself amazed that even when she is entirely drained she finds more energy to give to our children.  With three kids under five it would have been easy to just let them run wild around the house but that isn’t Amy.  She has a strong passion to see our kids grow, mature and know how to behave in a respectable way.  She has done a great job with consistently loving and discipling our children.  Not only that but she is always thinking of creative things to do with them.  I am often amazed at the things she does with the kids that I know would blow my top with stress! Things like letting a two and four year old free paint. Freak me out!  The thing is it doesn’t even shake her.  Another area that she excels in as a mom is teaching our children about the Lord and taking those teachable moments and maximizing them. I am thankful for her passion to share Jesus with our children. There is nothing she would not do for her children. Amy is such an amazing mother, I can not praise God enough! Thank you Lord for the woman you have created in her.

She is an amazing women of ministry! As I just wrote about all the things she has done to get us through the last four years I am am blown away to be able to say that she is others centered.  The truth is she could have been a hermit the last four years and said she was too busy to get involved in the lives of others.  That isn’t her though!  There have been women over the last four years that she has poured her life into despite everything going on.  She truly loves people and it drives her to make the time to help them out.  Even when she would be hurting she was still willing to give. She is truly amazing! I am blown away by her!

She is an amazing follower of Jesus!  I praise the Lord that I have married a women that loves God and wants to have a life conformed to Him.  Over the years she has learned much and there would be times when I would come home and she would share what Christ was teaching her.  She was driven to be in church because she wanted to stay close to Jesus.  She would find time to read the word and pray because she knows that He is the source of her strength.  I know that her love for Jesus will be an example to our kids.  I was always amazed how when either one of us felt drained spiritually the other seemed to be strong and close to Christ.  We were often able to mutually encourage one another in our walk with Christ.

She is an amazing fighter in Christ!  The truth is that while we have been in seminary there has been many attacks against us as a family and her individually. Some have been from struggles in my life that she has fought through and forgiven me only to see our love grow deeper.  Also though she has been attacked physically.  While in seminary she has dealt with tendonitis in her shoulder while having three kids to care for. She still deals with that today.  Even when she was in incredible pain she would still pick up our kids and love on them when she was needed most.  She also had a scare with the potential for cancer that she fought through.  She had a baby that involved a tough, tough pregnancy.  She had a cyst grow on her foot that had to be checked for cancer and had to have surgery on.  She had a large kidney stone after Emma was born and had to have surgery to deal with that. All the while she still dealt with headaches and migraines.  As I write that list I am amazed at what she endured with three kids and having me in school.  She fought through and relied on Jesus.  There was also a broken nose and surgery , and staples for Alexa and stitches for Noah’s head. Again through all of this she fought through and remained positive!  She walked with Jesus and remained full of love!  She is truly an amazing women!

She is an amazing proofreader!  Finally I don’t think I could have made it through seminary without her proofreading skills! Those who know me, know writing is not my expertise but with her help I got through with a good G.P.A! Thanks Amy!

Everyday I can’t praise God enough for Amy!  She is my friend, lover and bride!  I really and honestly could not have made it through without her!  Her support and encouragment were always timely and appropriate!

Thank you Lord for such an amazing gift!

I like being with her!

I love her so much!

I love you Amy!