Tag Archives: parenting

Smelling Roses: Part 1 of 3

mt marcy

mt marcy

Growing up my dad and I took time each summer to backpack. I look back on those times very fondly and hope that I will begin backpacking with my kids as they get older. Almost all of my backpacking took place in the Adirondack Mountains in New York State. Some times we would hike 15 to 20 miles in a day so that we could ascend to the top of one of the 46 high peaks. The views were always so wonderful once you got to the top.

As a young kid much of what I stopped to enjoy was the views from the peak. I always thought my dad was goofy for taking pictures of flowers and spider webs. As I would rush up the trails to get to the destination and then fly down the mountains to get back to camp my dad would always try to get me to slow down and enjoy the views along the way. I remember times when he would stop and have me come back to him so I could look out over a cliff and see a beautiful view. For me it was always about the destination and never about the journey. I couldn’t wait to get to the top to say that I had completed the journey and tackled another of the 46 high peaks.

I have found that it is so hard to stop and enjoy the journey! I want to get things done and play when the task is completed. This causes me to be driven to get things done. At times this can be quite valuable but I find that it also means that I get to miss the enjoyment of the process. I miss the joy of the people along the way because I push hard to get things done. This push relegates people to tools to get things done. Parenting is another things that I often want to see accomplished rather than enjoying the journey with my kids. By God’s grace I have been given a view of what I would like to see our kids be like as they grow older. I work towards that view understanding that the view can change. Understanding the importance of each moment, of the journey means that I will also maximize the enjoyment of life for both myself and my kids. God is also helping me realize this and to slow down. To enjoy the journey leads to us getting the most out of everything that is accomplished. When we complete the task without the joy of the journey we not only miss out on many teachable moments but we also miss out on the opportunity to grow with others. As my dad (of course the statement isn’t original to him) would always tell me:

Stop and take time to smell the roses!

In my next post we are going to explore further this idea of smelling the roses but next time we are going to explore why this idea is not complete.

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Becoming a Man

Over the last year I have been away from home on two different occasions. As many of you know Amy and I have four kids, 3 girls and 1 boy. Each time I have been away I used it as an opportunity to help my one son, Noah to become a man. One of my desires for Noah is that he becomes a responsible young man and that he also becomes chivalrous. I want him to know that it is a good and honorable thing to take care of women and to serve them. Even at the young age of six I want him to know that he has a responsibility to his family to care for them.

Each time before I left I had a conversation with Noah about his responsibility to the women of the house while I was gone. That because I was gone he was now the man of the house and it was his job to make life easier for everyone else and to serve the girls. As I shared this with him I took time to tell him what this looked like. I even asked him what he thought it meant and how this looked. To my surprise Noah had a really good idea of what it meant. As I wrapped up the conversation with him I told him that I would be asking him how it was going and how he was taking care of the family when I talked with him on the phone.

Noah is growing into a fine young man! Both times he took his role very seriously and did more than usually around the house to help Amy and his sisters. These are a couple of the things that represent how Noah took on the responsibility. When Amy was doing laundry he would carry the basket of clothes for his her. He also took on the responsibility of collecting all the trash and wheeling the 96 gallon trash bin out to the road. Noah isn’t that big yet so that is quite the job. A final example is the 10 foot bundle of sticks that he dragged to the road after his grandpa cleaned up one of our bushes. I am so proud of Noah and the servant he is becoming.

After each trip I made sure that I got him something that represented the young man he was becoming and to let him know that I was proud of how he stepped up to help his mom and sisters. This fall when I was in Seattle I picked up a sheriff’s badge for him, which he still keeps by his bed. This time while I was in England I decided to get him a Swiss Army Knife. To all those worried that I got him a knife at six, don’t be. The knife is made to be dull so that he can’t hurt himself. My prayer is that these small gifts will remind him of the man his is becoming!

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Filed under England, family, parenting

Becoming a Man


Over the last year I have been away from home on two different occasions. As many of you know Amy and I have four kids, 3 girls and 1 boy. Each time I have been away I used it as an opportunity to help my one son, Noah to become a man. One of my desires for Noah is that he becomes a responsible young man and that he also becomes chivalrous. I want him to know that it is a good and honorable thing to take care of women and to serve them. Even at the young age of six I want him to know that he has a responsibility to his family to care for them.

Each time before I left I had a conversation with Noah about his responsibility to the women of the house while I was gone. That because I was gone he was now the man of the house and it was his job to make life easier for everyone else and to serve the girls. As I shared this with him I took time to tell him what this looked like. I even asked him what he thought it meant and how this looked. To my surprise Noah had a really good idea of what it meant. As I wrapped up the conversation with him I told him that I would be asking him how it was going and how he was taking care of the family when I talked with him on the phone.

Noah is growing into a fine young man! Both times he took his role very seriously and did more than usually around the house to help Amy and his sisters. These are a couple of the things that represent how Noah took on the responsibility. When Amy was doing laundry he would carry the basket of clothes for his her. He also took on the responsibility of collecting all the trash and wheeling the 96 gallon trash bin out to the road. Noah isn’t that big yet so that is quite the job. A final example is the 10 foot bundle of sticks that he dragged to the road after his grandpa cleaned up one of our bushes. I am so proud of Noah and the servant he is becoming.

After each trip I made sure that I got him something that represented the young man he was becoming and to let him know that I was proud of how he stepped up to help his mom and sisters. This fall when I was in Seattle I picked up a sheriff’s badge for him, which he still keeps by his bed. This time while I was in England I decided to get him a Swiss Army Knife. To all those worried that I got him a knife at six, don’t be. The knife is made to be dull so that he can’t hurt himself. My prayer is that these small gifts will remind him of the man his is becoming!

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God: a better parent

This taken from “Think Orange” written by Reggie Joiner. He reminds us that God is God and that we need to trust Him with our kids.

“I am not trying to make them happy;
I want them to really live.

In the middle of their pain,
I can be a better friend than anyone,
even you.

I am the only one who can really
love them unconditionally,
forgive them forever,
and be a perfect Father.

So maybe you just need to trust Me
enough so they can see Me.

Besides…
with all your issues,
I think it’s probably better
for them to trust Me more
than they trust you.

Isn’t it more important for them
to love Me more
than they love you?

I can heal their hearts;
you can’t.

I can give them eternal life;
You can’t.

I am God;
you’re not.”

Pg 56 “Think Orange”

May each of us realize the truth of this as we seek to raise our kids to love and know God! Parenting can be scary, in those times we need to trust God more!

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